Wednesday, January 22, 2020
Satirical Poem :: essays research papers
University Applying to college is a slow and painful process. Because itââ¬â¢s really hard to get accepted, unless You are better qualified than thousands, and their thousands. You know; the bank accounts in the Caribbean islands. I had to study really, really hard for the SATââ¬â¢s, In order to even stand a shot into any of the ivy leagues. And luckily, My family, Can donate a library, Or instead of Columbia University, Iââ¬â¢d be off to Albany. There are whole bunch of these so-called admission committees, Who skim through your extracurricular activities, Because thatââ¬â¢s the only way you might be able to get in with those Bââ¬â¢s. Although the wait is lengthy, donââ¬â¢t worry, because it really is fair, You see, because if youââ¬â¢re a minority, deny you, they wouldnââ¬â¢t dare. If the letter says ââ¬Å"Sorry, but we can not accept you into the graduating class of 2005â⬠Youââ¬â¢ll survive! Because you can still resort to the U.S News and World report, And look at the next twenty-five schools for comfort. Worst comes to worst thereââ¬â¢s a neat little trick, All you have to do is be born holding a lacrosse stick. Or if you really want to pull a rabbit out of a hat, Try complementing that with a baseball bat, Perhaps even a wrestling mat, And youââ¬â¢ll get in, just like that! And most importantly you must decide West coast or East coast and how long is the ride? But it all pays off at the end, with a job at Price Waterhouse Cooper or Goldman Sachs, So that at the 10 year high school reunion youââ¬â¢ll be getting the last laughs. Whatââ¬â¢s really amazing though is that with all these great schools this country has to offer Itââ¬â¢s amazing that so many kids are still hanging out, smoking on the corner. Corrupting their minds with drugs and whores While all their spare time should be spent improving their scores. Taking test after test after test after test after test, Making sure their parents standards are met, and of course kept
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